246. How to Let Go of the Bully in Your Brain with Allison Guilbault

Are you mean to yourself? It seems like a strange question to ask. I’m so stupid! Ugh, I can’t believe I did that! You know what I’m talking about. Those moments where we attack with negative self-talk. Today’s guest, Allison Guibault, helps women release self-doubt and deal with what she calls high functioning anxiety. She has made it her job on planet Earth as both a therapist and a coach, to help women let go of doubt, shame and limiting beliefs so they can reconnect to their confidence, reclaim their empowerment and realign with their intuition and highest power. Allison was stuck in a corporate job that she was successful at but didn’t really like. She was burnt out and exhausted. One day, she snapped and said she rushed to her therapist’s office.  “I spent the next few years really trying to rework my entire life, and it was really hard,” says Allison. “There wasn't a lot of messaging out there that I was connecting to about, you know, things you talk about like abundance, mindset, the ability to change your mind.” But she did it. And she hopes her work coaching helps other women shorten the learning curve in seeing there’s another way to work hard, keep all their core qualities and find fulfilment in life. The truth is, we’re really impressionable. Allison thinks back to all the messaging we receive as girls, as simple as, “Don’t speak up in class, you’re going to come off as bossy,” which taught us to quiet ourselves. Whereas a boy in class doing the same thing might hear that he’s a leader.  Overtime, we start to collect all of these stories about what life is supposed to look like. Allison says it’s important to ask yourself where this thought came from?  “Shifting our thoughts from something that's really negative to something positive -- and it doesn't even have to be positive,” says Allison. “We can land on neutral. Like I'm just not going to bully myself today.” It does come down to science. The more you think something, the easier it is to access that thought and the more you start to apply it. It could be as simple as saying, “I’m allowed to have needs.” This will chemically shift your brain, and you’ll become more likely to believe that.  Allison likes to offer a 30-day challenge. When you’re brushing your teeth, practice saying something – literally anything – that isn’t negative.  “I get a lot of resistance,” says Allison. “Like someone who's not used to saying nice things to themselves. Even neutral things to themselves. They're in that mind chatter that's really negative. This is going to feel weird and uncomfortable.” Healing is powerful. Personal growth is incredible. Change is transformative. But you can’t get to any of those steps without some discomfort. Some fear. Healing usually means letting things go – whether it’s old patterns or a relationship, which can be really difficult for people. “To take those steps, we need to resecure our safety. We need to feel supported because we don't usually do that work like blindly and alone.” Sign up for Allison’s newsletter: https://www.anotefromyourtherapist.com/innercircle  Connect with Allison : https://www.instagram.com/anotefromyourtherapist/  Other GoG episodes you might want to check out: Overcome Societal Expectations of ‘You’re Not Enough’  https://sarahwalton.com/societal-expectations-for-women/  What to Do When ‘You Can’t Do Anything Right!’  https://sarahwalton.com/negative-thoughts/  You can check out our podcast interviews on YouTube, too! http://bit.ly/YouTubeSWalton   Thank you so much for listening. I’m so honored that you’re here and would be so grateful if you could leave a quick review on Apple Podcasts by clicking here, scrolling to the bottom, and clicking “Write a review.” Then we’ll get to inspire even more people! (If you’re not sure how to leave a review, you can watch this quick tutorial.) #NegativeSelfTalk #PowerOfThoughts #OvercomingDoubts #PersonalGrowth #MentalHealth #AskExpert #SalesCoach #BusinessCoach #SelfWorth