#53 -Stained Glass Windows- Master your Mindset with Angela Cox

Mastering Your Mindset: You’re Better Than You Think You Are Do you often ask why you’re not like other people? Does this stop you from going outside your comfort zone? If you answered yes, then that’s okay. You are not alone — everyone has doubts, but you can clear them from your mind. This episode kicks off a new monthly series, Master Your Mindset. I talk about why you’re better than what you think you are. I also share the reason behind this mindset and what you can do about it. Tune in to the full episode and learn how you can master your mindset to believe in yourself. Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode: Learn about the shackles that hold you back from realising your full potential. Discover how the stained-glass window develops and how it affects your behavior. I will also share how you can remove the stains from your window. Resources Join us at Project Me Academy! Coaching with Angela You’re Better Than You Think You Areby Angela Cox Episode Highlights [04:52] The Problem with How We Are Designed We are better than we think we are, but there are some days that we struggle to believe that notion unless we are psychopaths or narcissists. We struggle to believe in ourselves because we are designed to doubt ourselves. Thus, we often try to stay within our comfort zone — to avoid rejection. Our design also makes us not fully aware of ourselves, and we start to question our worth and value. This year, I want to help you believe that you are better than you think you are. I’ll help you rev up your self-confidence so that you will remember how badass you are when the feelings of doubt resurface. [07:19] The Five Shackles That Hold You Back In my book You’re Better Than You Think You Are, I’ve identified five shackles that hold us back from realising our potential. And I was able to name them because I’ve experienced them myself or heard about them from the women and men I’ve coached. These shackles include the shadows or fears, stained-glass windows or beliefs, big T trauma and small T traumas. Big T traumas are experiences people can quickly identify as traumatic, such as domestic abuse or childhood trauma.  Small T traumas may include hurtful words people tell you and other small events that affect how you see yourself. [09:15] Understanding the Shackles: The Stained-Glass Windows When I was a child, my mom and I used to go to church on Sunday. And there, I would always stare in awe at the stained-glass windows. I was fascinated by how different faces look like when light from those windows shine on them. This stained-glass effect happens when you start to feel alienated while with other people. You begin to see them differently. When this happens, doubt begins because you start to wonder whether you are actually “normal.” It also occurs in situations where you react horribly to an event or circumstance, but others appear unperturbed. Everybody has stains, and they differ for each of us. Listen to the full episode to learn more about the stained-glass window shackle. [14:53] Looking at the Window Your window frame is your sensory filter. It is everything that you experience with your senses. This window takes in all the information you get from your surroundings. The information is neutral until you give them meaning, which creates the stains in your window. An example is when you’re asked to stand and read in front of the class. Like me, some people may enjoy doing this; others may feel anxious or shy, so they stumble along the way. How you perceive people’s reactions towards you creates a stain in your window — an embarrassment, humiliation or intimidation. Tune in to the full episode to learn more about how we form the stains in our window. [21:38] The Problem with the Stains These stains significantly affect our behavior and how we see ourselves. Because stains of different people vary, others may find it difficult to understand why you’re acting a certain way. These stains also